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Life as a Gnomer

Gnome Songs


Gnomer Home
Gnoming
The Power of the Gnome
Look at the Gnome
Gnome - Friend or Foe
From Here to There
You think You Know a Gnome
Gnome Lore
The Green Gnome
Gnomer News
Gnome Songs
Related Gnoming Links
How to Contact a Gnomer

Oldies but Goodies...
 
The Original Gnome Song
 

The Gnome - tray rapping it (Pink Floyd insists)
 
I want to tell you a story
About a little man
If I can.
A gnome named Grimble Crumble.
And little gnomes stay in their homes.
Eating, sleeping, drinking their wine.

He wore a scarlet tunic,
A blue green hood,
It looked quite good.
He had a big adventure
Amidst the grass
Fresh air at last.
Wining, dining, biding his time.
And then one day - hooray!
Another way for gnomes to say
Oooooooooomray.

Look at the sky, look at the river
Isn't it good?
Look at the sky, look at the river
Isn't it good?
Winding, finding places to go.
And then one day - hooray!
Another way for gnomes to say
Oooooooooomray.
Ooooooooooooooomray.

Christmas Gnome
 
Bought a gnome for Christmas
People think I'm weird
Why'd I buy this little guy
With fishing rod and beard?

Christmas day will find me
Playing with my elf
I bought a gnome for Christmas
I gave it to myself

Bought a gnome for Christmas
Why should I pretend?
I study the physio-gnomy
Of my only friend

Christmas day will find me
With a smily face
Bought a gnome for Christmas
That is all I have to say

The Laughing Gnome - by David Bowie
 
I was walking down the high street
When I heard footsteps behind me
And there was a little old man (hello)
In scarlet and grey, shuffling away (laughter)
Well he trotted back to my house
And he sat beside the telly (oaah..)
With his tiny hands on his tummy
Chuckling away, laughing all day (laughter)

Oh, I ought to report you to the gnome office
(Gnome office)
Yes
(Hahahahaha)

Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing gnome and you can't catch me"
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing gnome and you can't catch me"
Said the laughing gnome

Well I gave him roasted toadstools and a glass of dandelion wine (burp, pardon)
Then I put him on a train to eastbourne
Carried his bag
(Haven't you got a light boy?)
"Here, where do you come from?"
(Gnome-man's land, hahihihi)
"Oh, really?"

In the morning when I woke up
He was sitting on the edge of my bed
With his brother whose name was fred
He'd bought him along to sing me a song

Right, let's hear it

Here, what's that clicking noise?
(That's fred, he's a "metrognome", haha)

Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing gnome and you don't catch me"
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing gnome and you can't catch me"

(Own up, I'm a gnome, ain't I right, haha)
"Haven't you got a gnome to go to?"
(No, we're gnomads)
"Didn't they teach you to get your hair cut at school? you look like a rolling gnome."
(No, not at the london school of ecognomics)

Now they're staying up the chimney
And we're living on caviar and honey (hooray!)
Cause they're earning me lots of money
Writing comedy prose for radio shows
It's the-er (what?)
It's the gnome service of course

Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing gnome and you don't catch me"
Ha ha ha, oh, dear me

(Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing gnome and you can't catch me"
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing gnome and you can't catch me")